The ''I love morons'' watch

This particular feature of my blog is not intended to be cruel or bitchy (well not too much anyway,hehe)This is going to be an ongoing feature in my blog. Basically what the ''I love morons'' watch means is I will be updating my blog with facts about the STUPID beyond belief people I have had either the fortune/misfortune of working with in the past, depending on what way you look at it. To this day, all these silly souls have managed to evade winning a Darwin award and I'm still puzzled as to how they avoided this achievement. Most of the people watching for now will be things from the past, as currently I am unemployed as I need the time off to get some volunteer work done at primary schools so that I am prepared to do my teaching course. Seriously though, I just find morons hilarious!! They both wind me up and crack me up inside. Now don't get me wrong, a lot of people I work with are really lovely, but some are just plain thick, there is just no getting around it. So, I will start this first ''I love morons'' watch with genuine quotes from various people (of the moronic kind) that I have either overheard or had said to me. Of course though, I am not going to name and shame as that would be unfair so the quotes will be anonymous I'm afraid. Some of the quotes are by the same person though and if they were, you can identify them by their unique moron number if it repeats. Quotes are in green. Enjoy!


''Hee hee hee, I've got wind.'' moron 1, female. This person often said this one again, and again, and again....Glad I wasn't sat too close.

''This work is challenging'' Now this quote was again by moron 1, she said this about basic admin work that a monkey could do.

''I know for a fact that people only speak French in the Channel Islands'' moron 2, female

''Have you tried outside Staples?'' This quote doesn't make sense at first I know, but when you put it in context it does. This quote was said by moron 3, male. One of my favourite moron's it has to be said. He was someone similar to a manager. He was in fact talking about a car park outside Staples. The day he said this I was 15mins late for work in the morning because the city parking spaces often fill up way before 9am and this particular day, the lack of spaces was made worse by several car parks being closed off, not sure for what reason but they were closed. I had to spend a total of half an hour driving around looking for an available space that morning. Hence why I was late for work. The Staples car park was directly outside my at the time place of work. So no moron 3, I never thought in a million years of checking for spaces right outside work! Of course I did check, moron 3, because that is the first place I looked you moron.

''We must remain vigilant... ...fraudulent manor'' This genius, whom we shall call moron 4, wrote this in an email that she sent out to the team. This lady was of a manager type position and could not spell or write professionally to save her life. I believe what she in fact meant was 'fraudulent manner' and not a fake house. She also severely failed to remain vigilant.

''You need to be more vigilant'' Her favourite phrase. Oh the irony, need I say more. moron 4.